The Quintessence of Running
DUDE, IT'S A ROCK
Wednesday, May 26th. Travel day.
The flight out of Philly was delayed for almost an hour. Eventually when the wheels left the ground, the trip out west went without a hitch. We arrived late in the evening in Las Vegas taking a taxi from the airport to our hotel where we basically crashed into sleep.
Thursday, May 27th. Meet up day.
The next morning Sarah and I picked up her brother Micah and his friend Tony from their hotel. They flew in from San Francisco the day before. Then picked up John M from the airport around 1pm. John M flew in from Illinois. A quick drive thru at a In and Out Burger and thus began the 3 plus hour road trip to Duck Creek Village, Utah.
The Bryce Canyon 100 Pace/Crew team is now 90% complete.
John W arrived around 7:30pm. He had been on the road for some time. He originally left from Connecticut some number of days before and drove cross country to meet us in Utah. His arrival now makes the team complete.
And what a team this was. John W and John M to me I have always considered the heart and soul of my ultras. Simply because they have been there since my very first 100 miler. Bryce Canyon was going to be number four for me and every time I ask each of them if they are willing to be part of the pace/crew team, both have always said yes. The newest members of the team were Micah and Tony. Newbies may be to the team but boy from preparing amazing team dinners to making caramel and chocolate syrups drizzled over popcorn and just taking the time to be part of this journey, they do not get any more solid than these two. Then there’s Sarah. She has been my rock for the past year and a half. Her love, support, understanding and accepting of why I choose to destroy myself makes me in awe of her.
Friday, May 28th. Shakeout day.
In the morning Sarah joined me for an easy 3 mile shakeout run around the village. Cardio wise my chest felt a little constraint during the first mile but eventually my lungs and my legs came to me. After breakfast we all drove to the town of Hatch, 30mins away to pick up my race packet. Bib# 122. Quick browse at the expo and back we went to the cabin. On the way to the packet pick up Sarah suddenly remembered I had forgotten to prepare the three drop bags I had planned to drop off at three different aid stations out on the course. These personal drop bags can be crucial to the runner as it contains personal items that the aid stations may not have. For me, it’s fresh socks, wipes, Vaseline, Gatorade and my personal race day nutrition which is Huma (chocolate raspberry is my favorite). No worries though, John W, John M and Sarah were planning on going back out on the road anyway to map out the crew accessible aid stations. After dropping me off back at the cabin, they drove back out and delivered my drop bags. This is a prime example of what a great pace/crew team is.
Also today, I received a few good luck text messages from friends, including one from my son Noah and a really sweet good luck video from the high school girls I help coach at Padua Academy. They reminded me that I intend to carry with me throughout my entire run, the prayer card for Lee Kaufman. Lee was my fellow coach at Padua who recently and suddenly passed away.
Saturday, May 29th. Today, I will run 100 miles.
3:30am alarm. The day is here. Whether I like it or not, the day is here. The team is up. I am up. I am aware of what is ahead of me. I never take these things for granted. Never. You would be foolish to do so. Race starts at 5am. We arrived at the venue about 4:15am. We sat in the car to stay warm. Temperature was in the high 30’s. It’s dark and I’m doing my best to gather my thoughts, taking deep breaths to calm my nerves.
4:50am. We head to the start line. Last minute check of my runner flashlight, hydration vest and nutrition. All good. Gloves on, hat on, laces tied. Ready. Hugs all around from each pace/crew members. Then off we go across the start line, into the dark to what I always call the mouth of madness.
I have 36hrs to finish this 100 mile race. My goal, always when it comes to 100 miles, is exactly that, to finish. When this is over, all I want is to see my name in the race results, NOT have the acronym DNF (Did Not Finish) next to it. If this is the case, then I have accomplished my goal. I am not here to race anyone but myself, the course and the cut off times. My biggest concern being a sea level runner is the altitude. The race starts at 7,400ft and climbs to 9,100ft. Elevation gain and loss is 14,550ft. Being from Delaware, the highest point is 447ft. Exactly.
I crossed the start line at 5:04am. The road is dusty. Bypass the first aid station, Proctor Canyon at 2.1 miles. Next is Blue Fly station at 3.7 miles. Here, a very quick top off with water. Off I run to the next aid station, Johnson Hollow at 10.7 miles, which is unmanned and a water station only. The ascent here was rough but it was early enough in the race I felt strong during the climb. The sun is up at this point but I am still layered as the mountain air is still too cold for me. I am feeling good, enjoying the beautiful scenery Utah has to offer. I am looking forward to the next aid station as I know I will see a part of my pace/crew team. I arrived at the East Fork aid station a little after 8am at mile 13.1 (half marathon done. Woo Hoo!). Here I am met by John W, Micah and Tony. They check on me, ask me how I feel, top me off and I continue running. 6.3 miles later, I arrived at Coyote Hollow aid station. I’ve now covered 19.4 miles. Here I am met by Sarah and John M. I eat for the first time, real food. A quarter of a banana, maybe half of a PB&J? I can’t really remember. I do remember drinking ice cold water from a hydro flask. It was delicious. John tops me off, I layer off my long sleeves and wrap it around my waste. The temps have climbed and it is getting hot. Hugs from both and off I run again.
As I leave Coyote Hollow, I remind myself now it’s going to suck. Why? Because I will not see my pace/crew until mile 57.4. That is exactly 38 miles without seeing them. It’s going to be tough. The reason I will not see them until mile 57.4 is because the aid stations in between do not allow crew access. It is simply too tight to have anyone else there except the aid station volunteers and these are pretty remote locations. Bottom line is, this is the reality of the race and moping about it won’t do anything. I make it to the next aid station, another unmanned water only station, which is Thunder Mountain at mile 27.4. I wet the bandana which I had tied around my neck and squeezed the cold water on top of my head. Temperature is now in the 70’s. It is hot! I am filthy from the dirt and grime. I made it to the next aid station which was only 2.2 miles away. 29.6 done. This is Hillsdale Canyon and here I have my first of the three personal drop bags. I grabbed more Huma gels, swigged from my Gatorade and off I ran again.
The next aid station, Proctor Canyon (pass 2) is the first crucial cut off time check. This was another ass kicking, gut wrenching section. The climb was just relentless. Proctor Canyon is the first Grim Reaper cut off time. All 100 mile runners had to be here, mile 35.4, no later than 4:30pm. If you come in AFTER 4:30pm, your day is done. I rolled in at 2:15pm.
Mile 38.5 was the next stop, the third water station only. Then a massive climb totaling 6.5 miles to Bubble Creek. This was the worst climb. I came up with new curse words during this section. I mean it was pure fucking evil. But somehow, I made it. 45 miles done. Kenab Creek station was next at 52.4 miles. It was getting dark. Here I ate more real food, dawned my headlamp and layered up again. The temps dropped and I am cold once again I am cold. From here I was so looking forward to getting to the next stop, Straight Canyon at 57.4. This is where the team was waiting for me. This is where I was going to finally have them pace me, keep me company. But before getting here, I dealt with the dark, the cold and solitude of running by yourself for miles. The field had completely spread.
As I got closer to Straight Canyon, I saw a green light in the dark off to the side just in front of me. I heard a voice say “Nice job! You’re almost there.” It was John W’s voice.
He didn’t even know it was me approaching. I was so happy to see him. He led me to the team. This aid station was like a big party in the dark in the middle of nowhere. I am relieved to see so many people. Then I see Sarah, Micah, Tony and John M. I am hurting badly but I’m smiling inside. They sat me down, threw a blanket over me to keep me warm. Micah handed me hot soup. John W massaged my calves, Tony placed heating pads on the back of my neck, John M topped me off and Sarah, she was getting ready to pace me for 10 miles. This again, was a prime example of what a stellar pace/crew team I was privileged to have with me. It was now about 11pm. Time to go. Time to move.
Sarah and I eft Straight Canyon and had to deal with a tough climb to Pink Cliffs water station at mile 62.1. The wind at the top of this mountain was really blowing. One section was so steep and treacherous. Not paying attention to your surroundings could literally take you off the edge of the mountain. The overnight part of a 100 miler is always the toughest part for me. You are sleep deprived, beyond exhausted and this is usually the time I end up hallucinating. Sarah did an amazing job keeping me alert and focused. I was so happy she was with me. We topped off my water and kept moving. We arrived at mile 67.2, aid station Crawford Pass. The team drove ahead and met us here. This was the second crucial checkpoint you had to be at before a specific time. The cut off time for Crawford Pass was 4:40am, you were done. We rolled in at 3am.
Next pacer was John W. As he was getting ready to pace me, I sat down to rest. Tony handed me a cup of hot water to hold so I can keep my hands warm. Micah gave me a cup of coffee. I’m sure I ate more real food but I can’t remember what I had.
John W and I left and headed out the opposite direction from where Sarah and I came from. This was the turnaround point. We moved 10 miles back to Straight Canyon. This route was a little more difficult than the direction Sarah and I did only because the downhill was really hurting at this point and then there was a long and gradual multiple switchback style climb back to the top of Pink Cliffs. John did awesome pacing me. He kept reminding me to focus on my turnover and to run any flat sections. I thanked him for being out there with me. He told me at that moment he would not want to be anywhere else doing what he was doing with anyone else. I know he meant his words and that is why despite the pain, I kept moving as best as I could.
Soon, we saw and felt a beautiful and wonderful thing called a sunrise. It was magnificent greeting it from the top of a mountain. I reminded myself this is one of the reasons why I am out here, to experience a specific moment like this. John and I arrived back at Straight Canyon where the team was waiting. This was the last checkpoint. The cut off time here, mile 77 was 8:20am. We rolled in at 6:55am. I have dodged the last Grim Reaper time!
Last pacer up, John M. He and I are down to do 23 miles. John M told me I could count on him to take me to the end, that he was going to be my huckleberry. He did not hesitate to say yes when I texted him three weeks before if he could give me 23 miles. John M is not just a true friend, he is like a brother to me. We headed out and covered 5 miles back to Kenab Creek. Slow going at first because I was cold but eventually, we got moving. And moving is the key when it comes to the ultramarathon. Pace is out the window. I mean you still need to maintain a specific pace in order to meet the 36hrs cut off but running pace doesn’t really matter. What matters is you keep going no matter how tired you are. Here I grabbed more Huma gels from my drop bag. I sat down for maybe 15mins to eat and rest. I remember thinking at this point now I have less than 20 miles to go. We moved again, this time heading back to Blubber Creek (pass 2). This was a tough 7.4mile stretch. I have now covered 89.4 miles. It started getting hot again. The sun was out and it was beating me down. John kept reminding me to hydrate. Again, I sat down for a bit to rest and eat. After John put sunblock on my face it was time to move again.
The next stretch was by far the most grueling section. I. Hated. This. Section.
It was absolute hell. Miles 90-96. The elevation was never ending. The pitch of the climb was fucking insane. I tried to run down any flat sections to bank time but very soon here in front of us was another climb. I walked as much as I could and then stopped when my heart rate felt uncomfortable. When I felt better, we kept climbing up. I must have repeated this process at least a dozen times going up the section.
In the same god awful section I suddenly looked up and I stopped dead in my tracks. I see this thing which to me was also staring right back at me. It was about 10ft away. It was still, motionless. It was big, about 2ft high off the ground. It was brown, had a long body and it was in a stance as if it was ready to lunge at me and eat me! I could not believe what I was seeing!!
“What??” John asked.
“Do you see that?!?” I said with a sound of panic in my voice. I was scared.
What I was looking at was a Komodo Dragon. Holy shit. A Komodo Dragon! At mile 92 in the middle of the trail! John had to see this. From behind me, he peeked over my shoulder to see it.
He sees it. Then he says, “dude, it’s rock.”
What? I thought. A rock? No, it’s Komodo Dragon! I closed my eyes hard for about 3 seconds, then opened them again. Oh yeah. Ok it is a rock.
Passing the “dragon” we finally made it to the top of the mountain at mile 96. There was an unmanned water station that I had been so eager to get to because we knew from that point it was all downhill. We topped off my water bottles and started running down the mountain. At this point the dark clouds rolled in and the storm dumped rain and wind as if the race said, “I got more shit for you to deal with.”
Finally at mile 99, John was trying to text the team to let them know we were coming into the finish. But the cell service was bad so I told him to just run ahead so he can let them know and that I can take it home by myself. He asked me if I was sure and I said yes. So off he went and behind him after what seemed to be a long, long while, here I am approaching the finish line. It seemed forever to get there but at the last turn I saw it.
I could hear the cheers and heard the MC say “Vic Aguilar from Wilmington, Delaware coming in to the finish everybody!”
I crossed the line at 35hrs, 14mins. With all my might I walked over to the traditional gong and banged the shit out of it to mark my official finish.
POST RACE REFLECTION.
I am so tired but I am elated that I finished. This was the toughest 100 miler I have ever done. The elevation and the pitches of the ups and downs were unforgiving. It took every ounce of strength from inside my mind and my body to finish this race. It tested me beyond my limits. The ultramarathon will always try to make you NOT finish. That is what it’s designed to do, to break you.
When you are out there it will give you 100 reasons to give up. You need to combat it with 200 reasons of your own not to. The physical pain will be there. I guarantee it. It will hit you like a ton of bricks. You cannot avoid it. You cannot hide from it. You just need to accept it. It is why when it comes to the ultramarathon your mental state needs to be at its absolute top form. The pain is real but as long as your mind is powerful enough to convince yourself to push through the pain, you will give yourself that much more chance to cross the finish line.
The emotional struggle is also part of a journey like this. You will be mad, lonely but if it all works out, you will be happy. You will think of your life. Where you’ve been, where you are at and where you want to be. And you will be more appreciative, especially the people around you that love you and support you. And you will appreciate yourself. And you will be grateful. I am grateful that my mind and my body still have the ability to survive something like this. It reminds me that I can survive anything that life throws at me.
FUN FACTS:
225 of us started the 100 mile race. 107 finished. 118 did not. My finish time nabbed me 3rd place in my age division.
Finally, the Komodo dragon (Varanus Komodoensis), also known as the Komodo monitor, is a member of the monitor lizard family that is native to the Indonesian Islands. Not native to Utah.
